What Not to Write in a Sympathy Card

Here are a few things that you should never write in a sympathy card unless you want to offend the person you are giving the card.

  1. “______ got what he deserved.”  This is a ridiculous thing to write to someone if it is a sympathy card.  Only a total jerk would write something like that.
  2. “You owe me money.” If the person who died owed you money and you now think that the surviving family should pay you back, there are better ways to get your money than writing about it in your sympathy card.  Wait a few weeks and write a letter explaining that the deceased owed you money, and that you would like to get your money back if possible.  Another way to think about it is that you gave your money to the survivors as a bereavement gift.
  3. “I guess it was just his time.” This is cold and insensitive.  Only write this if you are God or the Grim Reaper.  You are not either, so it’s not nice to rub it in after someone has already died.  If you are a psychic and you knew when his time would be ahead of time, then you should have given everyone a warning.
  4. “Time heals all wounds.” If it’s true, then don’t be surprised if you get a wound from the bereaved when they inflict bodily harm on you.  Then you can see if time heals your wounds.
  5. “You’ll be o.k.” This is a stupid thing to write in a sympathy card, because it may not be true.  You really can’t predict whether anyone will be o.k.
  6. “He had a good life.”  While this may be true in your eyes, most people surviving a loss would like to have had more time with their loved one.  It’s not time to put things in perspective in order to make the bereaved stop feeling sorry for their loss.

Leave a Reply